Literacy 2008: Book 9: More Information Than You Require

hodgmanmoreinfocover.jpgBook
More Information Than You Require by John Hodgman

Synopsis
John Hodgman got famous from “The Daily Show” and those Apple ads and also he’s friends with Jonathan Coulton. (Actually: a continuation of his almanac of made-up facts, begun in The Areas of My Expertise).

Dismaying Fact Discovered
Hodgman is only 24 days older than I am.

Pros
Plenty of inspired bits of surreal comedy that reminded me of Woody Allen and Steve Martin’s comedy-sketch books. Reading random passages made me laugh out loud, several times (and that’s rare). Has a made-up children’s rhyme about the Jonestown Massacre that is pure genius. Has a well-written and genuinely sweet love letter to his wife that is disguised as an essay about alien abduction. Contains the phrase “also, a poop tube.”

Cons
When reading it in order, the set-up/surreal punchline IN ALL CAPS schtick can start to seem a little tedious and forced. Feels more disposable and contains more celebrity name-dropping than I’d expected. The 700 mole-men aren’t as funny as the 700 hoboes, somehow.

Verdict
Hodgman is all about the delivery, both in person and in print, but he’s also managed to distinguish himself as an earnest and surprisingly sincere writer as surprised by his own fame as anyone else. If you’re a fan of the previous book, you’ve already gotten this one. If you’re wondering what the fuss is about, start with The Areas of My Expertise, even though this one is funnier.

A Personal Note
Obviously, I didn’t make it even halfway to my goal of reading 26 books in 2008. For those who are math-deficient, I didn’t even read a book a month, and some, like this one, were short comedy books that technically shouldn’t count. As with so many other things, I blame Strong Bad.

BUT, I have learned a valuable lesson: don’t make New Year’s Resolutions. Or at least, don’t write about them on the internet.

Comment on this Post

I Won't Miss Him.

Over the past few days, Starchie Spudnoggen has been posting pages of a semi-obscure Toybox comic by Steve Purcell (could the two internet personalities somehow be related?)

It starts with nine pages of “The Visitor” from the Dark Horse Hellboy Christmas Special, and ends with Ernie’s Holiday Ditty. (The Toybox story from Fast Forward is up there, too).

This is great, because I haven’t been able to find the Hellboy Christmas special for years. I’m pretty sure I owned it at one point, because the story seems awfully familiar. And as much as I love Sam & Max — which is a lot — I think the original “Toybox” story is my favorite thing Steve’s ever done.

Comment on this Post

And Santa Can Be Our Regular Saturday Night Thing

I know it’s been done before, but what can I say, I’m a sucker for tradition. Here’s wishing everybody (including Mr. Swayze himself) the haziest, laziest, Swayziest Christmas of them all.

Pain don’t hurt, everyone! Pain don’t hurt us one and all.

Comment on this Post

Sack o' Monkeys in My Pocket

I was wandering around the internet last night and ended up spending at least an hour looking at MST3K clips on YouTube. It really was the best television series ever. There’s the Idiot Control Now song from Pod People:

(You can see the bit they’re making fun of as well).

And the Fugitive Alien Medley. And the “Big McLargeHuge” running gag from Space Mutiny. And possibly best of all, The Jet Jaguar Fight Song from Godzilla vs. Megalon:

Now I’ve got to see how many episodes I can fit on an iPhone for watching on the plane…

2 Comments

8-Bit is Enough

sb5_videlectrixCovers.jpg
8-Bit Is Enough is the senses-shattering season finale for Strong Bad’s Cool Game for Attractive People, and it’s out right now! On WiiWare and for PC from the Telltale site! What the hell are you doing still reading this, instead of buying it and playing it?!?

This one was a metric ton of work by everybody on the Homestar team, in every possible capacity. (We even had to pull in people from the Wallace & Gromit team). We like to cram too much stuff into the finales to make the season go completely off the rails in a fiery cataclysm the extra mile towards customer satisfaction. But I think it came together well, and it’s a nice capper to the series. I think everybody who worked so hard on it should be proud of it.

Thanks to the Chaps for letting us play around with their characters, and for putting in so much work to make the series cool.

2 Comments

Your Eyes are Getting Very, Very Heavy…

I forgot to mention: last week my friend Jake invited me to be a special guest villain on the Idle Thumbs podcast (direct iTunes Store link to the one I’m on), which he runs along with Chris Remo of Gamasutra and Nick Breckon of Shacknews. I’m told that the gang frequently gets together to talk about videogames, so if that’s your thing (and if casual swearing doesn’t drive you into apoplexy), then you should download it onto your audio-listening devices.

Listening to last week’s reminded me how soporific my voice is. I’ve always been vaguely aware that I tend to be “low-key,” but now I think I understand better why it seems like people stop listening to me halfway through one of my monologues. It’s not that they’re not paying attention, it’s that they’re desperately trying to remain conscious. And all these years I’ve struggled with insomnia, and the answer’s been sitting there in my own larynx this whole time.

But back to the podcast: I should make it clear that I’m only talking in one of them! The rest are filled with extreme videogame excitement, I’m told.

3 Comments

I Don't Heart Huckabee

I just watched the December 9th episode of “The Daily Show”, which ended with Jon Stewart’s interview with Governor Mike Huckabee on the issue of same-sex marriage.

Stewart did a good job with the interview, making his point forcefully without being disrespectful to his guest. He raised almost all of the relevant points, he explained them well, and he called Huckabee on his weaker points.

But it’s just infuriating to see this left as a simple disagreement between two passionate but mutually respectful sides, when it’s not. Huckabee brings nothing to the table, and every single one of his arguments is easily refuted:

  • Earlier in the interview, Huckabee talked about being against “intrusive government.” He then proceeded to argue that banning same-sex marriage is justified, which is the very definition of intrusive government.
  • “The only way that we can create the next generation is through a male/female relationship.” Which means that marriage is solely about procreation. But to the best of my knowledge, heterosexual couples are still allowed to marry even if one or both of them is infertile. Even more alarming, heterosexual couples can be married even if they don’t plan to have children! If Huckabee is concerned about the definition of marriage, then the definition of marriage should be “two adults who can and will produce a child.” But that’s not what he says, he says “a man and a woman.”
  • “30 states have had it on the ballot, and in all 30 states, it’s passed.” Might doesn’t make right. We have a judicial system specifically to guarantee that the rights of a minority are not overwhelmed by the will of a majority. But when the judicial system does its job, people scream that they’re “legislating from the bench.”
  • “…even in states like California, which no one would say is socially conservative.” Except for San Diego, the majority Catholic Latino or Baptist African American populations of LA, and most of the rural areas in central California. Which everyone understands are socially conservative, and are exactly the demographic that voted in favor of Proposition 8.
  • “It’s not that they’re saying they’re going to ban something, as much as they’re going to affirm that it’s how it’s always been.” As Stewart points out, Prop 8 in California does ban same-sex marriage. Claiming that it’s not a ban is completely disingenuous and cowardly.
  • “If we change the definition, then we really do have to change it to accommodate all lifestyles.” The slippery-slope non-argument is nothing but bullshit. It’s the second-oldest argument against same-sex marriage, and the most easily refuted. Huckabee’s ridiculous example of “the guy in West Texas who has 27 wives” is nonsense: that is a fundamentally different construct than two consenting adults entering into an exclusive contract of marriage. To equate same-sex marriage with polygamy is nothing more than a lie.
  • “There’s a difference between the equality of each individual and the equality of what we do, and the sameness of what we do.” and later “There’s a big difference between a person being black and a person practicing a lifestyle.” Hot on the heels of the slippery-slope lie, is this, the oldest argument against same-sex marriage, which is that being gay is a choice or a lifestyle. While there are millions of people who would be able to patiently explain to Gov. Huckabee that it isn’t a choice, and that the word “sexual orientation” instead of “sexual preference” is more than just PC name-wrangling, the fact that being gay isn’t a choice is actually irrelevant to this discussion. Because the choice that people are making is choosing to enter into a stable and loving relationship with another adult. If you can rationally and logically prove that that “lifestyle choice” is detrimental to society, then you are welcome to ban same-sex marriage, but you’ll have to ban heterosexual marriage as well.
  • “Religious people don’t have the right to burn others at the stake, they don’t have the right to do anything they wish to do.” Except, apparently, violate laws regarding the tax-exempt status of religious institutions and use their finances to campaign for political issues that affect people who don’t subscribe to their religion.
  • “Those who support the idea of same sex marriage have a lot of work to do to convince the rest of us.” No, you arrogant bastard, those who support same-sex marriage don’t have any obligation to ask for your permission before entering into the same types of relationships that millions of heterosexual couples are granted by default. Actually, Stewart put this one a lot better than I did. It’s a fucking travesty that people can be subjected to the demand, “You say you’re not a pervert? Prove it.”
  • “If a person does not necessarily support the idea of changing the definition of marriage, it does not mean that they’re a homophobe.” No, if a person’s a homophobe, it means that he either doesn’t understand (or care to understand) homosexuality enough to know that it’s not a “lifestyle choice,” or that he believes that homosexual relationships are detrimental enough to society that they should be relegated to a lesser legal and social status. If a person supports the idea of changing the definition of marriage, it means that he wants to write it into law that marriage is about sex and procreation and not the loving relationship of two consenting adults. So apparently, Huckabee is both.
  • “Words do matter. Definitions matter.” And just as Huckabee doesn’t like being called the word “homophobe,” I suspect that thousands of married couples don’t like having their relationships called “civil unions” or “lifestyle choices.”

Stewart put it well: like the issue of abortion, the issue of same-sex marriage has passionate people arguing on either side. But this is not like that argument, because there aren’t two valid sides. There is just right and wrong — wrong both in the moral sense that it’s a gross inequity and is fundamentally unfair, but in the more relevant logical sense. There’s simply no rational or logical justification for banning same-sex marriage. People have tried over and over to present the issue as if it were a rational difference of opinion, and over and over again they’re proven wrong. That’s why they toss the hot potato to state amendments, where the people can vote on the issue without having to provide a rational justification.

Whenever this issue pops up, you always see someone trying to smooth over the situation by saying “we’re making progress” or “people will see the light eventually” or “fighting bigotry always takes time.” The question is why does it take time, every time? How come every time you want to teach people to treat each other fairly, you have to start over from scratch? That’s not the sign of the inexorable progress of time; that’s the sign of a severe learning disability.

3 Comments

Feedback's a bitch

lolcatsdoingitwrong.jpg
Previously on Spectre Collie, I made the claim that the “state of the art” in story-driven games still treat storytelling and gameplay as two completely separate things. In even the best games, the player’s role is that of the guy who pushes buttons and/or shoots guys in the way; the key story moments happen in between my actions, not as a result of my actions. As a result, storytelling becomes increasingly superfluous and marginalized. Worse than that, because my actions don’t really have any bearing on the story, they lose any overall context, which is the whole purpose of having a framing story in the first place.

I went on to claim that instead of treating traditional adventure games as if they were an evolutionary dead end, we should be looking at how those games work to make the storytelling and the gameplay the same thing. The player’s not doing stuff and then watching a cutscene, and the player’s not doing stuff while listening to conveniently-placed audio logs that provide color commentary tangentially related to what he’s doing. Instead, his role becomes that of collaborative game designer. He’s not just doing what the objectives screen says to do, but figuring out what needs to be done in the first place.

The problem with that, says the internet, is that everybody knows that adventure games aren’t fun. They’re exercises in frustration, where you’re stuck trying random combinations of items until you stumble onto the one completely illogical solution the designers happened to choose. That’s the last thing that action games should be doing, you hear, because that’s the exact reason adventure games died out (and good riddance!). And even if they wanted to, action games couldn’t adopt that type of puzzle-solving, because they’re inherently different:

Myth 9: In an action game, all the activity takes place inside the game, but adventure games are solved in the player’s mind.

That’s a very rough paraphrase from Manveer Heir’s “Design Lesson 101″ article about Sam & Max Season Two. Mr. Heir is a game designer at Raven who’s been writing fairly in-depth analyses of games on his own blog and Gamasutra. Now, since that article is about a game I worked on, anything I write in response is going to come across as reactionary and defensive. So I should make one thing clear up front: everything Mr. Heir says is a filthy lie, and his posts should be immediately stricken from the internet.

No but seriously: his main observation is dead-on accurate. Adventure games suck at giving feedback to the player. That’s true of every adventure game I’ve played, even my favorites. I think it’s the biggest obstacle for the current generation of games to overcome — not just adventure games, but any game that wants to engage the player on a level more interesting than “cross the finish line to get the next scripted event” or “press the button to trigger the next cutscene.”

There’s a lot I don’t agree with in Heir’s article — in particular, the idea that the adventure game model only works in small doses (in the “golden age” of these games, they were designed to last for several weeks); or that the episodes of Sam & Max Season One were far too easy because he was able to finish in two to three hours (that’s just slightly shorter than how long they were intended to last). But most of the criticisms are common to adventure games, and I would’ve probably agreed with them completely just a couple of years ago — in fact, the start-and-stop pacing of adventure games that Heir mentions was my biggest complaint when I started working in adventure games again.

But I think his observation that it all comes down to player feedback is insightful and extremely useful, for two reasons. The first reason is that it’s not just about difficulty — you can’t just say “Season One was way too easy, but Season Two got too hard in places,” because then you’re trying to hit a moving target, and it varies wildly from player to player. Earlier, I made the case that trying to find some objective measure of difficulty for logic-based puzzles is doomed to failure.

The second reason is that player feedback is something that’s common to all types of games, from so-called “cerebral” adventures to so-called “twitch” shooters. In any genre of game, we’ve got the same basic set of tools, but we’ve gotten so locked into our assumptions about certain game genres, that we’ve forgotten how to use them.

I can’t use these things together.

Go back to one of the most common complaint about adventure games: “I don’t like adventure games because I always end up having to use every item with every other item until I stumble on the one ‘right’ answer.”

Whenever I hear that complaint, my first response is: “Well, don’t do that.” The appeal of these games is in figuring out how to solve a problem and predicting what turn the story is going to take. If you don’t have an idea already in mind when you use the magnifying glass on the dynamite fuse, then why would you even try to do it?

And of course, that’s a lousy response. If you were to ask me what are the most memorable lines from adventure games I’ve played, the first ones that would come to mind are: “That doesn’t need to be painted white,” “I’m not putting my mouth on that,” and of course, “I can’t use these things together.” They’re not memorable because they’re particularly clever, but because I heard them over and over and over again. Because that’s how these games — all games — are played: you do stuff and see what happens. It’s the “interactive” part of “interactive fiction.”

We tend to have this silly idea of adventure games as being “thinking man’s games,” where the ideal player is the cliche of the guy who solves the New York Times Crossword Puzzle in pen. We watch a cutscene, then sit back in our easy chairs and mull over possibilities, then shout “Eureka!” and complete the puzzle. Not only is that insufferably pompous, it’s unrealistic and frankly, not very fun. You want to get in there and poke around and explore.

That’s yet another way Super Mario 64 gets it right: the first thing the game does is drop you into a playground and invites you to just run around and play. Climb trees, swim for a little bit, and learn how things work. It’s also one of the best design aspects of The Sims 2: most of the development time and creativity in those games goes into the failure states, the stuff that you wouldn’t see if you played everything the “right” way. Because learning how the game works is one of the most engaging parts of the game.

Type “HELP” for a list of commands.

There are several reasons why adventure games don’t do negative feedback well:

  • More stuff: In a shooter or platformer, the list of ways you can interact with the world is deliberately kept small. In adventure games, you tend to have a lot of different items at your disposal. It’s easier to cover every possibility of what happens when you shoot something or jump on something, than it is to keep track of dozens of objects and their interrelated uses.
  • Larger “possibility space”: Not only do you have more stuff in an adventure game, you’re usually expected to use it in an unconventional way. And as mentioned earlier, each player has his own idea of “unconventional.” What seems like a perfectly natural solution to a problem to one player might never have occurred to the game designers.
  • More dialogue: Gordon Freeman never speaks, so it’s not jarring when he tries to unlock a door and the game just beeps. It’d be really weird if Guybrush Threepwood tried to unlock a door in the game and didn’t say anything when it failed.
  • Managing difficulty: How do you respond when someone’s done the wrong thing? Do you just say “No?” Or do you say, “That’s a good idea, but wrong.?” Or do you say, “That won’t work, but using the magnifying glass might?” Or “That won’t work, but I bet I could use this magnifying glass to light that dynamite fuse?”

The thing to notice about those reasons is that none of them are unique to adventure games, and none are insoluble. (The closest to being damning is actually the “more dialogue” issue, since that depends on purely practical concerns like production time, voice recording budgets, and download size).

The one that sounds the most damning is the idea of a larger possibility space: how can a game give intelligent feedback when it’s impossible to gauge what the player’s thinking, how close he is to solving a puzzle? That’s the converse of the player’s frustration with adventure games, that it’s impossible to gauge what the designer was thinking when he came up with this stupid puzzle. To me, that doesn’t sound like the death knell of a game genre, but just a simple communication breakdown.

You can use these things together! Ask me how!

Although the hint system in Telltale’s games is almost universally regarded as A Good Thing — and I should point out here that not only was it not my idea, but I was actually against it at first and was proven wrong — it’s still a first step. It demonstrates that it’s not impossible to tell what the player’s thinking; we know the solutions to the puzzles, we know how people play adventure games because we play them ourselves, and it’s actually relatively straightforward to detect when the player’s stuck and what kind of information he’ll need to get moving again.

The issue with that, again as pointed out in Heir’s article, is that players sometimes stubbornly refuse to listen to hints because they feel like it’s “cheating.” The perception — which is unfortunate, but probably unavoidable — is still that the developers have the one “right” answer, and they’re guiding the player through the game, nudging him in the right direction when he’s too dense to figure it out.

I think a logical next step is to take the relationship with the player away from “we’ve got the answers, now you figure them out” and back to that idea of collaborative game design. In a game design session, nobody’s figured out the right answer yet. So the dialogue is one of “well, no, that won’t work for this reason… but what if we tried this other thing?” It’s less like a tutorial, and more like exploration and experimentation.

And the difference between that and something like a strategy game or The Sims is that there is still one right answer. It remains a conversation, instead of a toy or a playset. The developers go through the effort and frustration of coming up with a game that’s guaranteed to have some sort of satisfying resolution, instead of just giving the player a bunch of tools and then removing themselves from the equation. A big chunk of adventure game development is spent just figuring out valid alternative solutions to puzzles and then either implementing them, or explaining to the player why they won’t work in this case. It’s not that much of a stretch to extend that to an overall design philosophy: remembering that we’re not always trying to funnel players towards the one right answer, but keeping an open dialogue with them, guiding them towards the answer that we happen to have generated cutscenes for.

It’s my hope that this would extend past adventure games. If we can figure out how to engage the player in the actual storytelling without getting hopelessly stuck, then we can have more engaging stories in any type of game. And developers of more action-oriented games can include more significant story moments without being so terrified that they’ll frustrate the player and ruin the pacing of their game. And then I can finally play a game that forces me to think about what I’m doing, instead of just telling me to go here and press this button.

22 Comments

I Tell You What

saxby.jpgGeorgia’s changed so much in the 13 or so years since I moved away, that there’s not much left there that I miss. One thing I do miss is the accent, or at least my own version of it.

I never listen to myself talking (because, you know, I’m kind of boring), so I have to trust other people. And opinion seems to be mixed. I’ve heard “you don’t have an accent at all” as well as “you’re not from around here, are you?” and the plain old “huh?” I’m told that it comes and goes based on how much I’ve been drinking, who I’ve been talking to, and my proximity to Atlanta.

Which makes sense, because I tried so hard to get rid of it while I was growing up. Plus I watched an obscene amount of television, letting it leech away any trace of my origin just as effectively as it did my attention span. And now, as penance, I’m living in the one part of the country that has the blandest, most generic, straight-out-of-the-box made-for-TV accent possible. I’ve been listening for years, and the only distinctive thing I can hear in the SF Bay Area is the tendency to pronounce “both” like “bowlth,” and they’re not even consistent with that.

But a real Georgian accent, when it’s done right — although, as my mother claims, “I don’t know what business anybody has writing about the south if he’s been living in Massachusetts for decades.” — but a real Georgian accent done right is about as cool as you can get, at least in the United States. It’s mostly “Hey, how y’all doin’?” but with an undercurrent of “well truth be told I don’t particularly care ’cause I got plenty on my mind as it is, I tell you what.” The midwest is too much of the former; the northeast is all about the latter.

And it’s not like Texas (too much of the “yee-haw”), or the Carolinas (too much of an attempt to sound refined; the South Carolina accent always struck me as sounding fake). It isn’t like Arkansas or Oklahoma, either, since they took a good thing and stretched and beat it out to a painful-sounding extreme. And it sure as hell isn’t like what you hear on TV.

Except if you’re in Georgia, and you’re watching TV, and you’re seeing the Senate campaign attack ads between Saxby Chambliss and Jim Martin every five minutes. Those struck me as bizarre just for their black-is-white, up-is-down quality (the Democratic candidate is accusing the Republican candidate of being unpatriotic for not supporting the troops, and socialist for voting in favor of the Wall Street bailout). But they also struck me as bizarre because it’s the first time in a long time I’ve heard people speaking with southern accents on television, and they weren’t doing an impression, and they weren’t talking about country home cookin’ (Paula Deen’s been dead to me ever since I saw her put mayonnaise on a BBQ sandwich), and they weren’t the President, and they weren’t one of the Duke boys. But a well-educated, well-off person speaking with a southern accent that wasn’t faked.

I hate to sound too much like the SNL version of Zell Miller, but I think I’d cross party lines to vote for a man named Saxby Chambliss. (One of his ads has him asking God to bless Bush and Obama, and ends with his grandkids saying “Vote for my Big Daddy!”) I think we’ve done the Liberal White Southern Male Guilt thing long enough. It’s time for people like me to feel guilty for fleeing the south, forcing ourselves to say “can’t” instead of “cain’t,” and trying so hard to blend in that we let plain vanilla “American-ness” wash out everything distinctive about our upbringing.

Edit: I suppose I should clarify, this being the internet and all, since that sounded like I was actually endorsing the candidate with the cooler name. First, I haven’t been a resident of Georgia in over a decade, so I don’t keep up to date with the politics there. Second, voting for (or against) somebody based on his name is about as stupid as it gets. Third, based solely on the smear ads, I can’t even tell the two candidates apart. All I’m saying is that I feel dumb now for spending so many years trying to get rid of my accent.

4 Comments