Semi-caffeinated

Sleeping TigerIt’s been a really nice day in San Francisco, and I’ve spent the bulk of it inside trying to get my stuff in order and dreading having to spend all next week at Disney World. Is this what being an adult is like? If it is, I want no part of it.

The worst part is being without internet access for a whole week. Considering how much of my internet time is spent in pointless time-wasting, it’s remarkable how much I’ve gotten to depend on it. I wouldn’t be able to tell you exactly how I’m better off after reading RSS feeds and browsing websites and making rambling weblog posts and replying to e-mails. And still it does seem emptier when I can’t do all that.

Speaking of giving up dependencies, it’s pretty clear what is the addiction that’s causing me the most trouble. Smoking. But I’m not breaking that habit anytime soon, so I’m shooting for a slightly easier one: the caffeine. I’ve been taking baby steps to get myself off of it, starting by switching to decaffeinated Coke. It’s a minor shift, but I’m hoping that once I ween myself off the caffeine (hopefully without headaches), then I can start sleeping and getting up on normal human hours, thereby getting more stuff accomplished earlier, thereby no longer feeling so damn anxious all the time, thereby making it easier to kick the nicotine. Realistic or not, at least it feels like a plan.

Whether it survives after a week at a theme park, there’s no telling. But if I can’t actually spend time in the theme parks, and am left in a hotel room with nothing to do except watch the promotional video that runs on the in-room TV 24 hours a day (by the end of a trip, I can usually recite it from memory), then sleep may be a welcome option.